Happy Black Friday, ‘Merica! Can you (canoe?) believe it’s already that time of year to start shopping for your fanatical paddling brothers and sisters? And can you believe we actually spent time working up another gift list? Well, last year’s list was so well received – and they do say it’s better than to give than to receive – that we’re giving you another list to receive (and then give). Makes sense, right? Truth be told, it was actually a little harder to find more diamonds-in-the-rough in the jungle that is Amazon.com, but I think we found a good mix of gifts to consider for any paddler.
So let’s take a look at some of the more unique items we discovered on Amazon in this year’s (semi-tongue-in-cheek) gift guide. Hopefully you’ll find something perfect for that special paddler in your life who already has everything, or even nothing at all.
Cherry Wood Canoe Paddle Flask ($30)
If you stare at these two canoe paddles long enough, they’ll turn into eight depending on what you put in the flask.
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Kayak Cribbage Board ($40)
Last year, we featured a canoe cribbage board, and this year we found a touring kayak! Again, as a fan of cribbage, I can’t find any fault with this stocking stuffer.
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Kayak Patterned Coffee Mug ($9)
Look, a delightfully pleasing pattern of kayaks that you’d find at Dick’s Sporting Goods decorate this coffee mug.
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Unfinished Craft Canoe Project ($14)
Deck out your own deck(s) with this set of unfinished canoes. What you do with it afterwards is anyone’s guess.
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Birch Kayak Drink Coasters ($20)
What kayaker doesn’t need a birch coaster? No kayaker, I say. Well, except for maybe the guy with the aforementioned flask.
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Munchkin Paddlin’ Penguin Toy ($7)
For the tiniest of Miles-Paddlers – the Paddlin’ Penguin.
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Littlest Pet Shop Cat and Fish Kayak ($19)
For the aspiring paddling-toddler, here’s a cat and a fish in a kayak. As cute as molded plastic gets.
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PLAYMOBIL® Off-Road SUV ($25)
Let’s not forget the pre-teens who haven’t transitioned to (or been sheltered from) LEGOs, comes this sweet PlayMobil set with not one, but two kayaks (I guess Dad will just watch).
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Kayak Pillow Case ($16)
Never say never to big whitewater because you’ll be conquering bro-status Class V, VI, maybe even VII (!) rapids in your dreams while laying your head down on this kayak-patterned pillowcase.
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Wooden Canoe Paddle Keychain ($17)
It’s a keychain with canoe paddles on it. Pretty simple. Pretty subtle. Pretty awesome if it would also float.
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Insulated Moon Canoe Travel Coffee Mug ($25)
Take your jo on the water and mug for an Instagram selfie with this rather pretty insulated coffee mug.
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Canoe Paddle Pillow ($8)
This paddle-patterned throw pillow would look cozy on either a couch or in the deck of your canoe (not waterproof).
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World’s Okayest Canoer Coffee Mug ($18)
I don’t know why, but the “Okayest” thing still makes me giggle.
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Convertible Canoe and Kayak Patent Art Print ($12)
A convertible canoe/kayak? Seems brilliant. Even if it never made it to market, here are the plans to build your own. Apparently it was better off as a work of art than an actual invention, which is now why it’s available as a print made for your wall.
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Jordan River Holy Water ($10)
Here’s the perfect gift for river water collectors or the religious. Amazingly, there are a biblical variety of different Jordan River Holy Water brands available on Amazon. But, this one has a cross cap. The Jordan River is literally on my bucket list of places to paddle. I hear it’s righteous.
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Domino Canoe ($35)
Last year these were called “Men’s Canoe Dominoes” and made of wood. This year, the bones are more classic (perhaps real animal bones?). And, they appeared to have fixed the awkward description.
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Pecatonica SlapCan Cooler ($14)
Maybe not as cool as our own Miles Paddled koozies, but definitely just as random. Here’s a Pecatonica River koozie (or SlapCan Cooler as they call it). But it doesn’t stop here, because this seller has all sorts of random river-related tschockis for you to bestow on fellow river-lovers. There’s everything from keychains to ornaments to bottle openers and coffee mugs, to even bike bells! And all with the same design because all rivers are created equal, right?
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Squirrels Canoeing Socks ($12)
Squirrels paddling? Now I’ve seen everything. Though something tells me that wooden canoe will sink as soon as that little guy gets hungry…
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Colorful Kayaks Jigsaw Puzzle ($8)
This is a puzzle and it looks kinda challenging, but not as challenging as it probably was to Photoshop all those logos off the boats.
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Camp-Style Coffee Mug ($36)
A porcelain coffee mug disguised as a tin camp mug? That’s just cray.
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Kayak and Canoe Fishing Adventure Play-Set ($30)
This adventure playset is bizarre. Are these characters from some C-List Disney show? Regardless, not only do you get a touring kayak, but you’ll also score a fishing kayak – complete with some hungry largemouth bass.
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Canoe Candy Mold ($6)
Why stop at candy mold? It’s an ice mold for an old fashioned! A butter mold! A soft cat food mold!
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Corgis in Kayaks Wallpaper ($180 / 2′ x 27′)
The kayaking Corgis are back! This time, it’s not just fabric – it’s wallpaper!
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Kayak Paddle Bracelet ($50)
Do your significant other a favor and buy this for him/her. Even if they don’t paddle, it’s the gesture.
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Canoe Camping Cake Decorations ($8)
I want this cake topper on my next birthday cake and every cake from here on out. Understood?
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Canoe Playing Cards ($12)
“You gotta know when to hold ’em, know when to buy ’em”.
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Canoe Paddle Tablecloth ($104)
You’ll be the talk of Friendsgiving amongst your paddling friends (are there any other kind?) with this sharp-looking dull-bladded paddle-patterned tablecloth.
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Ugly Holiday Sweater For Canoers ($35)
I find nothing ugly about this ironic christmas sweater. Looks fash as hell to me.
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Metal Guitar Pick With Laser Engraved Canoe ($14)
It’s not just a metal guitar with a canoe on it – it’s a laser-engraved metal guitar pick with a canoe on it. Does it get anymore metal than that?
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Wooden Chopstick Rest With Laser Engraved Canoe ($19)
These will come in handy during those two seconds you need to set your chopsticks down to drink some water while inhaling a spicy tuna roll.
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Explore Every River Bend Throw Pillow ($11)
I’m not sure this half-canoe will float. Or wait, is that a double kayak with canoe paddles? So confused, but I do like the message.
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Paddle Your Own Canoe by Nick Offerman ($16)
I’ve never read this book. But it’s my favorite book title of all time next to “Paddling Southern Wisconsin” and this one.
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Diecast Teardrop Trailer With Kayak ($36)
I’m not sure what you do with this other than just put it together and look at it. But something tells me I’d just be jealous by looking at it and not owning the real thing.
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Bigfoot Canoe T-Shirt ($22)
Sasquatch! He does exist! And he stole a canoe! And apparently a kayak paddle! And he doesn’t know the difference because he’s Sasquatch!
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Tom Selleck Kayaking Print ($13)
Three words: Tom Selleck Kayaking.
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Related Reading:
30 Unique Gifts For Paddlers
40 Unique Gifts For Paddlers
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